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JOSEPH SHIRLEY Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for JOSEPH SHIRLEY
June 9, 2012
june 9 i sure do miss u what happen joe here today gone forever i still see us walking home from school in logansport playing at the first farm in the barn we were always together in school till middle and we both said we wanted diff classes but i really didnt want to you were a great brother we when thur a lot miss you and God Bless love you see you again
September 30, 2011
I am so sorry to hear of the passing of Joe. Even though he walked so fast everywhere he went, he took time out to say "Hello, how are you doing." He was one of the classiest and nicest men at the postal service.
I send my sincerest condolences and love your way.
Diane Despain Clauson
September 1, 2011
Dear Margo, I was saddened to hear of your loss. I met Joe a few times while we worked together at Butler. I loved to listen to you talk of your sweet family. You were a true example to me of love and caring in your job and with your family. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you at this time. With sincere love and respect. Jean Marie Lozano
Margo Shirley
September 1, 2011
Margo's Final Tribute to Joe
Dear Family and Friends,
Joe loved life!
I know that we have lost a dear husband, father, son, brother, uncle and friend.
I have Joe’s heart and he has mine. I am very saddened and scared about Joe’s passing, but I know that his earthly body was too tired to continue on.
Anna and Marisa have never and will never ever give up on their Dad. They have been my voice of reason and my strength to stay strong.
My brother in law, Erik said that Joe would not mind having a “hitch in his getalong”, but he would not like living with a severely damaged heart and mind.
I know that I learned something new and valuable everyday from Joe. I hope he didn’t mind me being his voice of reason.
Joe has been taking care of me as always.
We played cards at Brekke’s house on the Tuesday night before he went into the hospital. Sue had given me a popsicle that I loved. Joe went to the store on Wednesday and bought me those popsicles.
Some of the last words Joe was able to say to me were . . .
“I love you.”
“Don’t be a victim.”
“Pay the bills.”
I know these things for sure about Joe. . . .
Joe’s twin sister Anita will always be his soul mate.
Joe will miss his daily phone calls with his brother Paul and their support of each other.
My girls were their Dad’s best “bubbas” ever!
Joe’s love for his Shirley family is unconditional and they will miss Joe providing them material for their family stories.
The Miller family will miss Joe’s high bids in Pinochle, fresh guacamole, and great uncle tacos.
Joe will truly miss and be missed at the U of U football games, but he will be close by cheering the team on.
Joe loved seeing his neighbors and friends. He loved playing Sunday golf, neighbor parties, the theater, and planting new plants in the yard for everyone to enjoy. I am sorry you are just stuck with me!
Margo will miss Joe expressing and showing his daily love for his family. I will miss Joe’s 50-50 or in reality, 60-30 sharing of cleaning and great cooking. I will also miss my travel companion in life. Joe was and is the love of my life!
Joe’s family gets through good and bad times with their humor. If you do not know the Shirley humor by now, I am sure you will by the end of the day.
My family will do anything for us and they have not left our side.
Friends, thank you for the generous kindness that you have shared with my family. I know that you will all get me through this difficult year.
Joe’s passing was very peaceful for Anna, Marisa and myself. We were able to hug him and lay our heads on his chest and hear him slowly breathing till the end. Joe’s song for us is “You Are So Beautiful” by Joe Cocker. He took his final breath while we were playing this song for him.
Joe, thank you again for everything. We have learned from this experience and hope that we will be able to “pay it forward” in Joe’s memory. I know that I have learned again from Joe examples.
Joe, we love you forever!
Bill Ernest
September 1, 2011
Joe,
Thank you. Thank you for living your life with spontaneity, sincerity and lightheartedness, for sharing your extraordinary life wholly with us. Thank you for nurturing, caring, and providing for us with steadfast dedication, a warm heart and ever-open mind and arms.
You have a profound sense of what is right and wrong; one of the most honest men we will ever know, you were also the strongest, bravest, and most selfless person in our lives. You were always determined never to burden others with the despair of your pain and illness. Rather you lifted everyone, the twinkle in your eye, your warm smile and infectiously joyous laugh.
Beautiful inside and out, you brought happiness to others, regardless of whatever struggles you was facing at the moment. You just being there filled a room of people with joy and brought smiles and laughter to their faces. You had the truly unique gift of making anyone near you feel welcomed and loved.
You will be with us always, in our minds and our hearts. We are blessed to have had the time we had with you. We only wish it was longer. Now with deep, penetrating emptiness, our lives will never be the same. Because of your example, we will try to continue to live and laugh for you. We admire the person you are, and hope to emulate the wonderful qualities you have gifted us.
Thank you, Joe. Thank you for being there for us always, as a husband, father, uncle, brother-in-law and a friend. We love you with all our hearts, more then you will ever know.
Bill Ernest
Jim Jarrett
August 30, 2011
Thank you so much for keeping us updated on Joe's condition during this difficult time for you and the family. I had hoped that the most recent news was a sign that Joe would make it through and recover. Not to be. When I got the bad news today, and right through now, I am just empty. I so wanted Joe to make it. I so wanted the chance to see him again and laugh. I so wanted to be young again with him. We had fun together and, as we get older, those memories become all the more special.
When I was in my early teens, I was talking to my Dad and had made a comment to him that I thought that I had a lot of friends. My Dad stopped me at that point and told me that there was a big difference between a "friend" and acquaintances and that in life that, if a man had as many "friends" as he had fingers on one hand , he would be the luckiest man in the world. He went on to say that an acquaintance is someone that, when the times were good, would be happy to hang with you and enjoy what was going on. He also said that when times got tough, the acquaintances would be no where to be found. He told me that a "friend" was someone that when you back was against the wall and you had nothing to give him, he would be there to stand by you and support you. While, at the time, I thought that my Dad was pretty cynical in that outlook on life, now I realize the truth in what he told me. In my life, I have been blessed to have a few true friends. Those who I felt that I could count on in times of real need or trouble. I have always considered your brother, Joe ,to be one of those cherished few. He was one on my true Friends. He made me one of the luckiest men in the world. While we have been separated by time and distance, I have always felt that special bond with your brother. I am so very sorry for Margo, the girls and the whole Shirley family. Please let them know that we continue to pray for them during this time. God bless and thank you again for all of your efforts. Jim Jarrett
August 30, 2011
Margo...I was so sorry to read about your husbands death. It has been many years since we were at WJHS but I always admired you and share your sorrow at this time. Jackie Sybrowsky
August 30, 2011
Dear Margo, I am so sorry to hear about your husband's death. Just by reading the obituary and viewing your lovely slideshow, I can see what a wonderful man he was. Your daughters are beautiful and will be a great comfort to you as you mourn together. My thoughts are with you.
Love,
Pat Rothacher (Hassel)
Your old friend from Ben Lomond High School
Paul Shirley
August 29, 2011
A 5-Minute Tribute to Joseph Charles Shirley
December 26, 1947 to August 23, 2011
By Paul Shirley
Dear Margo, Anna and Marisa. Thank you for the opportunity for me to share some thoughts relative to Joe on behalf the entire Shirley family, some who are here to physically share in Joe’s celebration of life; some who are here sharing via their spiritual presence. I am humbled and honored.
Now the good news for everyone is that I agreed to keep my sharing to 5 minutes. I’m sure you’ll understand that any attempt to explain the impact of Joe’s 63 years, 7 months and 29 days (23,252 days) on this planet, is futile at best. Regardless, I’ll give it a shot via a 5-minute countdown. It seems appropriate, as Joe was our hippie child of the 60’s that saw America win the space race and put man on the moon.
Countdown Minute # 5 Here’s a high “5” for all the successes Joe had in his life. Let’s start with the fact that he survived birth. Mom didn’t know that she was going to have twins when she entered the hospital the day after Christmas in 1947. Joe arrived unexpectedly and looked like a newly hatched bird, a “bag of bones” as described by Mom. When he was finally capable of taking nourishment, Mom had to spoon-feed him, tricking Joe into eating the less than appealing baby cereal by putting bits of applesauce on top to cover up the taste. Of course Joe quickly figured out the scam and only ate the applesauce. Praise God that Mom was able to nurse him through his infancy.
Here’s a high “5” celebrating the fact that Joe survived being one of 8 children, growing up in a family that entered many hardships together and came out the other side stronger than before. He was tough as nails, yet loving and giving in ways that Mother Theresa would have embraced.
Here’s a high “5” for all the nieces and nephews, in-laws and outlaws, that he lovingly touched. From the first encounter, brother-in-law Joe made you feel like you had known him all your life. Uncle Joe was about as special as they come; quick with a joke and committed to teasing any child into submission with his smile.
Here’s a high “5” for all the friends that Joe came to have. Joe was trustworthy as they come, being there in intent, word and deed for anyone that asked for his help.
Here’s a high “5” celebrating the fact that Joe “married up”. We often wondered who would have Joe during his rebellious years (all 63 plus years of them), and were thrilled to hear about the engagement and marriage of Mr. & Mrs. Joe Miller on November 27, 1976. At least that is what the wedding announcement stated. Margo, thank you for providing Joe with the adult supervision that he required, whether he felt he needed it or not. The two of you made an inseparable couple in the more than 18 million minutes you were married. I bet it didn’t feel like 18 million minutes, did it?
Here’s a high “5” celebrating the beautiful family that came into being from the union of Joe and Margo with the addition of Anna and Marisa. The unbounded love that Joe had for his girls, always willing to put their needs first, was borne out time after time as he was “there” as a caring father.
Countdown Minute # 4 We want to thank Joe “For” everything. “For” all the unconditional love and laughter that he provided us; “For” routinely putting others before himself.
We salute Joe “For” his going above and beyond the call of duty in service to his country, whether it was via a reluctant entry into the US Army, or the decades of committed service leadership he offered through the US Postal Service. Everyone that he worked with knew they could count on Joe to get the job done, a progressive red-blooded American, a Hoosier from the heartland of the Midwest, who delivered using a blue-collar work ethic that he learned as a young man.
We hunker down “For” the “Fore” he would shout with each errant shot on the golf course, and the special times we had with him on the links. A gentleman at all times, whether he was winning or losing, he was a pleasure to have in any foursome.
We humbly thank him “For” his taking care of Mom, when she needed him to be her nurse and comforter. Unconditionally willing to humble himself as a man, he provided a loving touch that filled the spectrum from feeding her to bathing her. As a fellow Shirley boy, I’m the first to be in awe of him for his willingness to do whatever it took to be a comfort to Mom.
Countdown Minute # 3
Here’s to the “3” minutes that separated Joe from his twin sister Anita in birth. Those “3” minutes helped to define a relationship and a bond between “womb mates” that we all admired. They knew each other’s thoughts; they felt each other’s heart.
Here’s to the “3” older brothers, Dick, Tom and Keith who helped to make Joe tough as nails. At age 5 or 6 they would wind him up and send him in for a fight against kids more than twice his age. The stories are told and retold about Joe taking on football players double his size, tackling and leveling freshman football players carrying the ball when Joe was a mere 7 years old. Joe offered the triple threat of boney elbows, indifference to pain, and a field presence most could only hope for.
Here’s to the “3” younger siblings John, Diane and me who grew up in Joe’s shadow. Joe was there as we matured into young adults, willing to help any one of us when we needed him. When brother John was murdered, Joe routinely reached out to both Diane and me, and to our spouses and kids, as we sought to make sense of the senseless. He modeled the behavior of both strength and forgiveness, a unique package of intellect and feelings that we could draw upon.
Countdown Minute # 2
Here’s “to” everyone that had an opportunity to get to know Joe in the past; who get “to” know him in the present moment through this gathering of loved ones; and “to” everyone that will benefit in the future from the spiritual gifts that he unconditionally provided friends and family alike.
Here’s “to” everyone that knew Joe as “Huckleberry”. Dad gave Joe the nickname of Huckleberry as a young lad, a term of endearment that draws from the phrase “I’m your huckleberry” that was popular in the south in the early 1900s.
“To” be one’s huckleberry, means “to” be just the right person for a given job, a willing executor of whatever they are charged “to” do.
“To” be one’s huckleberry meant they were given a mark of affection as one’s partner or sidekick; a willing helper or assistant.
To be one’s huckleberry implied they appeared to be something tiny against something substantial; to be one that experiences life just a little bit beyond one’s reach or abilities.
Dad knew what he was doing by anointing Joe as Huckleberry, as Huckleberry took on the world and assisted in making it a better place to live, as a loving partner and helper for all of us that needed him.
Countdown Minute # 1
And finally, here’s to the “#1” F.A.C.T. that I want you to take away today about our Huckleberry that I believe defines him in so many ways.
F.A.C.T. It’s an acronym that helps us to live in loving relationship with the world, an approach that Joe had in his heart, and bore out in his life.
“F” is for forgiveness. Until we can forgive, as Joe was willing to do, we cannot truly live out our lives in a loving and caring manner.
“A” is for acceptance, an acceptance that Joe routinely exhibited. No matter what the hand Joe was dealt or the hardship he faced, he was always optimistically willing to get on with living.
“C” is for compassion, a natural compassion that Joe had for others; a loving sense of understanding and giving that he had for all those in need.
And finally, “T” is for the true meaning of life. The true meaning of life for each of us lies in the Belonging, the Doing and the Understanding that comes from our own personal journey. We all seek in our hearts to belong to something bigger than self, to be in loving relationships with God, our family members, friends and neighbors. We all seek to experience life by doing something that is attached to that sense of belonging, giving unconditionally of ourselves as we serve one another. There is not just one answer to the question of the meaning of life; it is in our shared understanding through our own journey with others as we experience the awesome wonders of God’s creation that we only begin to scratch the surface.
I’m convinced Joe lived out this F.A.C.T during his 23,252 days to the fullest, questioning the mystery of life by belonging, doing and understanding with those he loved the most, his family, his friends and his neighbors.
One F.A.C.T. is clear, Joe loved and he was loved. We are all better people for having had him in our lives.
May God speed you on your journey Huckleberry, and may God’s grace & peace that you helped extend to each of us be upon all his loved ones for eternity.
Anna Shirley
August 29, 2011
My Dad was and is the greatest person I have ever known. He has always been my guide and I want to live up to that example. My Dad is and always will be my best friend. He is a bright shining light in my eyes. He was always there for me through good and bad times. He was always there to pick me up when I fell.
He was truly a special person and I will take everything he has given me and carry it on in my own life and share with others. I am thankful for everyday that I had with my Dad.
My dad loved Native American artifacts. My Uncle Fred gave us this card with the Hopi Prayer and I would like us all to remember my Dad with this prayer.
Marisa Shirley
August 29, 2011
I always tell people how lucky I am to have a Father like mine and I truly meant every word of it. My Dad did and would have done anything to take care of my sister, mother and myself, as well as all of you here today.
My Father is the strongest, most loving, selfless and funny man I know. Most important he was always there for me when I fell down and had a kiss for my boo-boo to make me feel better. My Father is a strong and driving force of who I am today and I know he has touched many of your lives as well.
I have too many found memories of my Father to share them all now, but my Dad will forever live on through all our memories.
My deepest sadness today is that my Dad was taken away too early from us as we had so many more memories to create together, He will forever be missed. Love you Daddy!
Dave Misner
August 28, 2011
Thank you to the Shirley family for sharing this brief story of Joe's history. I had the privilege of sharing time with both Tom and Joe at the Postal Service. The picture you provided truly sums up my memories of sharing time with Joe. His warm yet unassuming smile matched all my experiences with Joe. He was easy to respect and expressed only respect to others. I am truly sorry for our loss; but hope the memories carry you to peace.
Mary Weis
August 28, 2011
Dear Margo,
it has been many years since we last spoke but I have always remembered you fondly. I was so very sorry to hear of Joe's passing. You and your daughters will be in my prayers.
August 28, 2011
My dear Margo,
I am so very sorry to hear of Joe's passing. I just heard about it today. My heart bleeds for you, Anna and Marisa. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Your friend, Joanne Hampton
August 28, 2011
Joe will forever be with us... truthfully how could he not be! Thank you all for sharing him with the rest of us. That is a gift that we all will always treasure. Bob and Toni Gannon
Woody Hendrickson
August 28, 2011
One of the best people I had the pleasure of working with at the Postal Service. Knew Joe from the day he hired on and worked with him as a Mail Handler and throughout our careers from different sides of the table on QWL, FMLA, and contractual issues. Joe was always willing to help in correcting problems and helping the people he worked with. I have and will greatly miss him. Peace my friend.
Kathy Garcia/Farnsworth
August 28, 2011
Margo my heart is heavy with sadness as I read of Joe's passing. I remember so many special times with the two of you. My fondest is our camping trip to Zion's park. I will never forget how Joe took Ron under his wing and helped him no matter how hard to enjoy the trip. I remember the breaded mushrooms and his famous chili soup. I remember how he made it to all the hospitals to check on clients to see I they were ok, when he himself was really hurt after our bus accident at Wac. Just like Joe others first. I believe he and Ron are reconnecting and laughing together once again. My love and respect for Joe is never ending he will be in my heart always. My prayers and love are with you and the girls. My you find peace in knowing Joe's mission on this earth was a special one as he touched so many lives.
Carol Calloway
August 27, 2011
Mrs. Shirley, daughters, and all of the Shirley family,
How unexpected to read of Joe's death! My heart aches for all of you at this sad time but rejoices with you to know Joe is in the Father's hands. May the good Lord wrap you in his arms and give you all strength and courage.
I will miss Joe.
Sincerely,
Miss Calloway (Carol)
Ed and Shirlee Miller
August 27, 2011
Dear Margo and Family,
We were saddened to learn of Joe's passing. We remember with fondness your visit to our Los Altos home when you lived in San Jose.
It's our hope that you will have inner peace knowing that Joe lived his life well and leaves a legacy of accomplishments and a prosperity devoted to the same principles that made him a outstanding man.
Ed and Shirlee Miller
Mike Miller
August 27, 2011
Dear Joe, Thanks for all you have done for our family. You will always be in our hearts and thoughts.
Thanks Margo, Anna & Marisa.
Love Mike, Vicki and family
Dan Wakeland
August 27, 2011
I'm kind of shocked and very saddened with this news. Ofcourse Elaine and Bruce were around Joe more than I was, but I remember some pretty rightouse pasture baseball games on the fourth of July and Joe seemed to be in the middle of them every time. No dought by now He's found a pick up game of something and is enjoying his well earnd rewards. I know God is with you all today and I have an extra prayer to say tonight.
Dan Wakeland
Ann Turner Hashbarger
August 27, 2011
My heartfelt and deepest sympathy is felt for you, Margo, and the entire family. No one made me laugh harder or was more fun to be around than Joe. I'm so grateful you have so many friends and family to help you through this. Joe will be with you forever. My sincere love and wishes for peace within to you all.
Joanie Hansing
August 27, 2011
I was very sad to hear of Joe's passing. In my 27 years with The Postal Service, Joe Consistently as a supervisor, treated me and others with the utmost dignity and respect. As a FMLA Coordinator, from my personal experience, his kindness and empathy was greatly appreciated. I will never forget that. Joe was truly a rare and unique individual. My condolences to his family.
Bonnie Muir
August 26, 2011
I have heard many stories of Joe's loving kindness not only to his wife Margo, but to his daughters and many others. I worked with Margo for 7 years. Not a day went by that she didn't mention how lucky she was to have Joe in her life. I met Joe twice, and both times was impressed by his kindness towards everybody in the group. He was witty, funny, gentle and very kind.
To Margo and the whole Shirley family, I offer my most sincere condolences to you for your loss.
August 26, 2011
We have known Joe for forty years ( Joe and Margo were married at our home in California). Everything Joe ever did was intended to elevate those around him. He was such a rare combination of passion and gentleness. He now resides in paradise but he will always live in the hearts of his family and friends.
Margo, Anna and Marisa - you are courageous women. Joe is be very proud.
Love Always,
The Wards
(Erik, Linda, Aimee, Jared, Linda and boys, Michael and Franci).
Jeri Bankhead
August 26, 2011
Dear Margo and family,
I'm so sorry to learn of the passing of your husband. Deepest condolences to you. You will be in my prayers.
Tom and Kathy Heffron
August 26, 2011
Dear Margo, Anna, and Marisa,
It is with heavy hearts that we send our thoughts and prayers to your family. Joe was, and in many ways still is, an inspiration to many of us. How he went through life, how he loved his family, and how he treated his friends, will stay with us forever. Never forget that Joe was also a reflection of you as well. He beamed when he would talk about you. He loved you tremendously and was proud of you all. The three of you must now go on, but know that you will have an army of friends and family to help on that journey. We love you and wish you peace.
Tom and Kathy
Annette Chaus
August 26, 2011
I worked with Joe for several years. We would always laugh about the "nun" stories. They always made me smile. Our prayers and smpathy to your and your family at this difficult time.
Kay Miner
August 26, 2011
Dear Margo, Anna and Marisa,
We just want to tell you how much we loved Joe. I will never forget the sweet things he did for me, Patrick and Megan. Remember when he "tended" the four kids while Margo and I went to Little America for the the weekend? I remember that he took Pat to a BYU football game. We also took a trip with you guys to Vernal to see the dinosaurs. I will never forget that Joe offered to be my date to my 20th high school reunion (Margo said it could only be a ONE evening thing! ;) Thanks for the great memories!
We love you guys!
Kay, Henry, Patrick and Megan
Mary Llewellyn
August 26, 2011
Margo you and the girls have my deepest sympathy. Joe was a great guy, husband and father. We have had some good times together. He will be surely missed. I was hoping to be at the graveside sevice, but my granddaugher alyssa is getting baptised the same day. My love and thoughts are with you and the girls. love Mary Llewellyn
Jerry Johnston
August 26, 2011
My condolencs to Joe's family. I worked in management with Joe for years at the Salt Lake Postal Service. He was always involved with making things better and doing the right thing. He always found time to laugh and seemed very happy in life. He will be greatly missed.
Pat Gallagher
August 26, 2011
As the days and weeks pass, and as you return to life's routine, may you continue to feel comforted by the love and support of family and friends.
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